As I write this …

…it’s hard to believe that I’m saying it again.

I’m going to give weight-loss another go. You all are probably growing weary of my failed attempts at this. Though, I will say, I don’t think I’ve gained much since my last fall from the wagon. In the last year, I haven’t bought up in sizes, and, if anything, my new clothes fit more loosely than they have before.

These days, I’m realizing that my biggest challenge with weight-loss is not that the weight doesn’t come off (last year’s results show the opposite) nor is it the motivational/encouragement aspect, because I’ve been blessed with so many AMAZING friends, family, church family and coworkers that offer nothing but support and praise all along the journey. My biggest “de-motivator” is self-justification.

self–jus·ti·fi·ca·tion

noun \ˌself-ˌjəs-tə-fə-ˈkā-shən\

: the act or an instance of making excuses for oneself

I don’t like to brag, but… I’m good at this. All-star, man; going pro. It’s just my luck that it isn’t a good thing. Being good at self-justification (for me) is akin to being good at falling down (I do that well, of late) or being good at hurting oneself. In this case, I would go so far as to say that it’s identical to both of those things.

Despite good results and firm support, I find myself saying, “You know, I’ve worked really hard this week. I can skip a day,” or, “I can have that tasty treat.” Sure, that wouldn’t be so bad if it stopped there, but it doesn’t. It grows and grows until I’m taking stock and saying, “You know, I get around pretty good for someone of my size… maybe I’m not as out of shape as I thought.”

I am “in shape”.  A shape. A nice, round one.